Changing Face

These last few days I have been shooting a short for Musical Theatre Students at Mountview College. I worked with the school last year. It's not a great gig. It's badly paid and I have no crew. In the van on the way to central London, overhearing the incessant trivial banter from the students, bordering on annoying- I was tempted to put my iPod on. Tonight I booked tickets to go to hear the talk: Cameras in conflict: the changing face of war photography held by Front Lines Club (a club that supports photojournalists and cameramen). I wanted to go so badly. Instead I spent a wasteful last hour dropping equipment off to tomorrows location and watching the blocking. I hardly ever become 'gutted' but i was today. I almost became resentful that my working hours for this crappy short film wasn't up yet and i wasn't going to make the talk that meant so much more to me. I spent the day in Bankside and then sweating in a bathroom shooting a couple arguing. A short that will go nowhere for me or for the people that make it. It really made me see how much time we at times waste for projects that despite needing the money and getting paid- not very much, is trivial and a general waste of time/life. I would much have rather heard the talk and talked with some photojounalist and camermen who have shot war photography.

I few years ago I killed to shoot anyones short. I couldn't care less for most of them now.

I got am email from someone I sent a showreel for a drink driving short that will be distributed in schools. He said despite liking my stuff, he thought my style wouldn't be suitable. I wrote back with a spiel about that DoP's have no 'style'. That Cinematography has more to do with collaboration and the attitude towards people and film making. He called me on my phone straight away and wants to meet up as he appreciated my email and attitude to speak up. I want to do this short. But it's up in the air. There's a chance. We'll see.

I am on board doing one about 2 suicidal people who meet up to do the deed and another, a period drama short in the autumn. Still waiting on the project in Syria.

- J